Loss

Death is a part of Life. So cliche… But it is true…

This week my family suffered a great loss, my maternal grandpa. He was the Rock of our family… And it was really tough to say goodbye… He had cancer that wore down his body… We knew we didn’t have much time left with him, but it still came as a shock to me. At least I can take comfort knowing he went peacefully at home in his sleep. No suffering. No pain. He just went to sleep….

It’s still surreal… The last few days have been a blur..

This was the first loss I’ve experienced as an adult… I lost my uncle when I was 5-6. A friend at 7 or 8… But I was still too young to process it or really understand it… And it is so hard.

I feel like I wish I had someone special to comfort me… My family members all have partners. And it’s hard not to notice that they have someone to console them… Please, please don’t think I’m trying to focus on the wrong things! It’s just more me being hyper aware of my being single because if the last few months…

I kind of felt like I held back a lot if my tears and pain because I was alone. I felt like I had to be the strong one… Not just because I was alone and single, but also for my other family members who were grieving… But inside, I just miss having this, another aspect of being in a healthy relationship, having someone intimate to be there for me in a time of need so that I could feel safe to open up and let loose my sadness… Just having your person there for you when I needed it.

I hope I’m not coming off as being selfish or making this about me… Just trying to get my feelings out the best way I know how, writing it out… I know I can always depend on blogging, at least, to comfort me…

~Aly. ā¤

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3 thoughts on “Loss

  1. I’m sorry to read about your loss :(, my grandad was the first loss in the family and it was and still has a huge affect on the family, I was 15 when I lost him and all my best years of driving etc he has never seen, I’m just sending you a comment to say that I’m here for you if you need me and I’m sending love and hugs, you aren’t being selfish I feel the same in certain situations all you need is a hug and a kiss and being told everything’s gunna be alright, stay strong and take your time,

    Your Friend,
    G.S šŸŒ¹šŸŒ¹ xo

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