Replay

One of the worst things about K being engaged, and me finally knowing, is that my brain keeps replaying the fact that I was so close to being the one he was proposing to.

My brain keeps replaying the fact that my mom told me that he had been saving up for a ring. For me. He was going to propose. He told her…

And now he’s engaged to someone else.

Because I was so stupid and selfish, all those years ago, and I left. I knew it, even as I was ending it, that I was making a mistake. That I should stop saying what I was saying and ask him to forgive me and work it out.

And now it’s too late.

It’s not me he is wanting to spend the rest of his life with, it’s her. Liz.

She’ll be the one to have his babies and grow old with him… She better know how luck she is…

Since the minute I woke up this morning, tears have just been falling down my face. I can’t stop them. It’s like my eyes are leaking…

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I truly hate my life right now.

I’m cursed when it comes to love.

God help me when I find out they actually are married.

-A.

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